Batty
by Lil' Quill
Summary: Lorcan Scamander and Scorpius Malfoy share a rather odd relationship.


Batty

A/N: First round of finals for the QLFC, and I am ridiculously excited!

Prompts:

4\. (word) curious

11\. (song) "Shut Up and Dance" Walk Two Moons

14\. (word) marbles

Sit back, relax, and enjoy!

* * *

It was official: Scorpius Malfoy hated his best mate.

I mean, sure, Albus was great and all, but roping him into watching over his young family friend Lorcan Scamander was a bit of a stretch, really.

For one thing, nine-year-old Lorcan was, well, completely off his rocker. Albus, the sly little Slytherin – although, that statement did also apply to Scorpius, really – had wormed his way out of any actual responsibilities with a combination of blackmail and persuasion and dumped all the real work on Scorpius.

Lorcan was a very...odd...child. He talked to the silvery bushes in the Lovegood garden – "Oh, hello there, how's your day going?" and "Glad to hear it! And I'm doing wonderful, thanks for asking!" – and beat at thin air with a polished stick – "We must get the Wibblewocks out before they can cause any actual damage!" – and somehow managed to magick the pots and pans into blurting out recipes so that Scorpius could cook – "I mean, it must be so difficult to cook all the time! Why don't you help them out, Scorpius?" – and walking over the the abode of the vampire down the street – "He's Professor Hagrid's assistant, you say, Albus? I must ask him about the Charrupinks that I sense around me! He'll know all about them! You'll come with me, won't you, Scorpius?" and all the while Albus just stood there smirking.

Scorpius swore that he wasn't that batty when he was nine years old.

* * *

By. Merlin's. Baggiest. Most. Frayed. Pants.

No.

Absolutely not.

Scorpius Malfoy would not tolerate this.

Nope, he was done.

Lorcan Scamander could not be coming to Hogwarts this year.

He could not handle another day like that one incident three years ago.

He absolutely refused to be that one person who would have to run after the child, but with Albus's insistence on his friend's welfare and that cursed laziness, it would most likely end up Scorpius's responsibility.

And then Scorpius noticed something else: there were two of the boys. Lorcan had a twin!

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

The most foul language he could think up ran through Scorpius's mind.

He watched in fascination mingled in horror as the ancient, frayed Sorting Hat was placed onto Lorcan's head.

Please not Slytherin, please not Slytherin, please not Slytherin –

"SLYTHERIN!"

Dammit.

* * *

Because his twin Lysander had been sorted into Ravenclaw, Lorcan spent quite a large amount of time outside the Slytherin common room and off the Slytherin table. However, he was just as ridiculous as before. For one thing, he had befriended the Giant Squid and was able to somehow converse with it. Now there was an enormous sea creature lurking around the underwater windows of the Slytherin dungeons far too often for Scorpius's liking.

Lorcan and Lysander, who were quite often inseparable, had both befriended quite a few of the Hogwarts paintings, too. One day they were conversing amiably with a woman in a poofy, heavily embroidered dress and a powdery white coiffure who was sitting regally with a cup of tea in her elegant hands – with the pinky finger jutting out, of course – and the next day with a slender, stern-looking man with an eyeglass who spoke in riddles and the next with the legendary Sir Cadogan.

Scorpius thought it was bloody ridiculous.

Because of their connections with innumerable paintings in the castle, Lorcan and Lysander were able to pull of ridiculous pranks right under the teachers' noses.

These pranks – once turning the Great Hall entirely upside down, using spellwork to have the letters fly the owls in instead of vice versa, and inverting all of the castle's colors for a day – caused great uproar in Hogwarts, especially because nobody knew the identities of these anonymous makers of mischief. It was, of course, all rather curious indeed. Scorpius, being observant and in the same house as the twins, was one of the few who actually knew these details of everything.

* * *

In Scorpius's sixth year at Hogwarts – Lorcan's third of course – the smirking, slightly narcissistic, handsome platinum blond boy began to develop this strange sort of obsession with Rose Weasley.

Perhaps it was just the way she whipped her shining fiery hair over her shoulders when she laughed, or the deep, warm brown depths of her eyes, or maybe even her petite yet lovely stature, or her adorable freckles, or, well, now he was stuck in a deep quagmire for thinking all this, wasn't her?

It was all the fault of those fluttery feelings in his chest whenever he thought about her.

Well, either way, considering the fact that Lorcan Scamander was close to her, and Scorpius dearly wanted to make a good impression on the girl, Scorpius would have to be kind to the boy.

* * *

Scorpius's seventh year. He was finally with the witty, bubbly, passionate girl of his dreams, and he loved every moment of it. Strangely, his relationship with Lorcan Scamander had seemed to progress into a strange sort of friendship.

(That didn't change the fact that the younger boy had completely lost his marbles, of course.)

And lately, Lorcan had been acting a little strange; even the paintings had begun to notice it. He was always fumbling with his pale hair, glancing around the room and blushing beet red, awkwardly shuffling his feet at times, blabbering more than usual, and just overall being a complete and utter mess.

Scorpius decided that he needed to get to the bottom of it.

Eventually, the fruit of Scorpius's labor paid off when he found Lorcan standing in deep conversation with a painting.

Scorpius promptly concealed himself and eavesdropped, of course.

"See, I really like Lily, but I don't know how to tell her. She probably thinks I'm really weird, and–"

Scorpius had heard enough. So it was apparently romantic problems, right? And, as the dashing Scorpius Malfoy, he decided to come to the poor boy's aid.

(Not just for brownie points from Rose, of course. At least, that's what Scorpius told himself.)

"Listen, Lorcan."

The younger boy jumped. "Oh, hello Scorpius. Didn't see you there," he mumbled.

Scorpius cleared his throat. "It has come to my attention that you fancy a girl. And, as Scorpius Malfoy, I am entitled to help you."

Lorcan looked rather taken aback, but he did nod his head. Scorpius took that as his cue to continue.

"Listen, if this girl – Lily Luna Potter, right? – is actually worth your affections, she won't mind your, well, oddities. She'll take you as you are."

Lorcan still looked a little dubious.

"Look, Scamander, there's a party in the Slytherin common room this weekend. Lily's going to be there, she never misses a party. Dance with her, you'll hit it off. She'll adore you."

"Oh, um, okay. Thanks. I'll see you around."

Scorpius was immensely proud of himself.

* * *

"Oh my Merlin! Look at how adorable those two are!"

Scorpius shielded his poor ears from Rose's squeals of delight and turned his attention to the sight she was so taken by.

It was Lorcan and Lily, talking.

Scorpius once again decided to employ his skill in eavesdropping.

"So, anyway, the pot then crashed into the ceiling and the Warbofer tried to eat it and–"

Lily, laughing, cut him off. "Lorcan, wanna dance?" She smiled.

The tips of Lorcan's elvish-looking ears turned bright red. "Yes, of course. But do you want to hear about the Warbofer more? Was I bothering you? I mean, it is pretty odd–"

"Lorcan, shut up and dance with me."

Scorpius smiled at the look of elation on his friend's face. He draped an arm over Rose's shoulders and sighed.

Quirky, kind, and unpredictable, Lorcan was definitely a friend Scorpius cared for.

* * *

A/N: Annnnd scene! How was it! Review, PM, Favorite, I'd love to hear your feedback!

Ink on!

Lil' Quill


End file.
